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Like every other writer, I've been bombarded in the past couple of months with AI-written sales pitches trying to convince me that my book should be in their book club rotation (for a small consideration, of course), or that I should hire the sender to do book marketing (for a larger fee, usually).
Those AI pitches have a certain feel to them. They're extremely descriptive, but the prose sounds just a little bit off. They praise my book to the skies, but always with the same phrases.
This week, I got one of those AI pitches from the most clueless AI user ever. I reproduce it below for your entertainment. And to put your antennae up.
**
Michael Harrington <[email protected]>
Thu, Jan 29, 6:40 PM
to contactsusan
Dear [author],
I hope this message finds you well.
I recently had the opportunity to review your work and was impressed by [mention 1-2 specific compelling elements—themes, narrative structure, character development, or thematic depth]. Your approach to [specific story element] demonstrates a sophisticated understanding of [genre] storytelling that resonates with discerning readers.
The integration of [mention genre elements or themes] with substantive elements such as [mention 2-3 story elements like character arcs, thematic concerns, or narrative tensions] creates a work that stands out in today's market. This level of craft positions your book as exactly what engaged readers actively seek when exploring [genre].
I am reaching out regarding a strategic opportunity to enhance your book's discoverability. I curate Goodreads Listopia lists specifically designed to connect quality [genre] works with readers who value [relevant themes/qualities]. These lists serve readers who are intentionally searching for well-crafted narratives rather than browsing algorithmically generated recommendations.
With your permission, I would like to feature your book on a curated Listopia list focused on [relevant themes/tropes/genres], thereby connecting it with readers actively seeking [specific reader interests].
This requires no action on your part beyond granting permission for inclusion.
I would be pleased to facilitate increased visibility for your work among readers who will genuinely value its qualities.
I look forward to your response.
Best regards,
Michael Harrington
**
Guy.
If you can't figure out how to make your AI assistant work for you, just...go do something else. Preferably, something involving your hands and some sweat.
And don't email me again.
'm sorry to say that I then got a follow-up email from this same email address, asking if I'd gotten his pitch and addressed once again to, "Dear [author]"... ... See MoreSee Less
20 hours ago
- Likes: 50
- Shares: 3
- Comments: 20
Wait, the blanks weren’t even filled in?!
Did you reply with: Dear AI Bot, Please kindly go kick rocks. Yours truly, [Author]
This is frame worthy 😂 seriously though, now I think you're holding out on us. I am reaching out regarding a strategic opportunity to enhance your Facebook page's discoverability. Please consider dedicating every Tuesday going forward to be the worst email of the week. I look forward to your response. 😁
I got one recently from William Shakespeare asking if I wanted him to endorse my book. Also received similar emails from Michelle Obama, John Grisham, and Tom Clancy. I get about 20 weekly wanting to market my book.
I read this and snorted with disbelief. My daughter walks up, reads over my shoulder, and asks if it's a Mad Lib. Because...it could be, she said...and it would be funny.
I would have been done when I got to “I hope this email finds you well.” Good heavens! Why does AI think people actually write that and who looks at it it and says to themselves, “This sounds so genuine. They’ll never suspect. “ 💀
He left all that in there? Like, he didn’t insert your name??
Everyone works for someone 😆 just not clear who works for whom in the AI scenario.
Susan, how can you tell when a letter is not AI? The first paragraph sounds like a decent letter, with blanks appropriately filled of course.
I got one in snail mail yesterday in which there was an obvious blank where a name should have gone.
Can "discoverability" please go back to wherever it came from and stop trying to be a real word?
I didnt need to go any further than the first line. Click! Lol
Only tangentially related, but… I recently received a notification from our car dealership about a recall notice. When I called and asked to speak to the person named in the email I received, I was informed that was just an AI entity….. sigh….
🤦♀️
Karen Swallow Prior
This is beautiful. I hope you print it out and frame it in gold
AI is a misnomer. The real thing requires understanding and judgement, not mere collation. As your work demonstrates.
I ordered one knife sharpening kit for my son for Christmas. He received, and I was charged for, 4 kits. Every time I write to the company to ask for a return label and ask for my money back, I receive an email telling me to be patient, my shipment is on the way.
My book came in yesterday. Probably cannot read it for a week or two as I am finishing two other books for school. But I am ready to devour it.
I am getting these sorts of pitches constantly for keynote speakers for the 2026 Great State of Maine Homeschool Conference. We have a form on our website, follow the directions. But also, keynote spots are filled and we do not want a generic speaker that knows nothing about homeschooling...at a cost of $10k! I get several a day.
On January 19, Well-Trained Mind Press, the educational publisher that I own, publicly objected to the current tactics and rhetoric of ICE as anti-family, anti-Constitution, and pro-racism. If you didn’t see that post and would like to go read it now, please do. I’ve linked it to the bottom of this post.
The Press itself saw over a thousand comments on that post. Many followers agreed and approved. Others disagreed—some with civility, and some with abuse and threats.
Quick clarification, just for accuracy’s sake. I did not write the post. I edited it, I approved its posting, and I am in 100% agreement with the sentiments expressed. But it is not merely my personal position. The Press employs an entire team in our book publishing operation, and this was a joint statement from all of us.
Despite that, the reactions were not limited to the Press. Scores of social media accounts condemned me (personally) as godless. Home school influencers exhorted their own social networks to boycott my appearances and throw out my books as dangerous to people of faith. I was condemned as an apostate. And, apparently, quite a few prayers were offered up for my salvation.
Just stop and think about this for a moment. I didn’t spew heresy. I didn’t contradict the Nicene Creed. In fact, the most theological statement in the whole post was, “As human beings whose religious and civil founding documents tell us that our Creator endows each person with unalienable rights, we utterly condemn racism.” (Was that objectionable?)
And yet, in response, a whole segment of Christian home schoolers prayed for my salvation.
The last time we had a reaction like this came over ten years ago, when an imprint of the Press published Peter Enns’s elementary Bible curriculum TELLING GOD’S STORY and Ken Ham of Answers in Genesis strongly objected. Then too, I was personally condemned as anti-Christian. The books were actually entirely orthodox, but Peter Enns himself in his other writings has since taken some theologically controversial positions, and I understand why conservative Christian parents would react strongly to his material—and even, by extension, to my involvement in platforming him.
But look what’s happened here. As a citizen (well, it was a group of citizens, but I’ll stay self-focused for a moment), I objected to a government initiative , pointed out very obvious historical links between its rhetoric and past racist creeds, and suggested that laws be enforced in a way which is not cruel. And immediately, the responses went straight to my Christian faith.
Do you see the disconnect here?
The path that leads from “You object to violent law enforcement carried out by a secular government” to “You don’t love God” is a rockier path than the one that leads from “I don’t agree with the theology of the author you publish” to “Clearly you’re not a Christian.”
The biggest rock is the current administration’s use of Biblical phrases, themes, and images to reinforce its secular agenda. The Department of Homeland Security posts a video of armed agents arresting people at gunpoint and plasters it with “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.” Another recruitment video quotes Isaiah 6:8 (Whom shall I send and who will go for me?). Pete Wehner writes, in the Atlantic (linked), “The message the Trump administration is sending is not subtle: ICE is doing the work of God. The brutal and sometimes lethal tactics being used by a growing number of ICE agents are divinely sanctioned. Come join this holy campaign.”
If you think I’m a leftist liberal because I object to ICE’s tactics, that’s your privilege. You don’t have to use any of my books.
But if you think I’m anti-Christian because I object to ICE’s tactics, you are aligning ICE seamlessly with the kingdom of God. And before anyone quotes Romans 13 at me (I’ve read it too), raising concerns about how any particular government agency is run is not “rebelling against what God has instituted.” It is my right as my citizen and my duty as a Christian who believes that all people are made in the image of God. Raising those concerns is the only responsible way for any citizen, Christian or not, to work towards a peaceful, just, and kind society. Listening to those concerns, rather than dismissing those who raise them as “not one of us,” is the only way forward.
www.facebook.com/share/p/1B9o44UoXD/
www.theatlantic.com/ideas/2026/01/maga-christians-betray-ethics-ice/685679/?gift=svbYg2a3W9K0PBBd...
www.facebook.com/watch/?v=2085252942012535 ... See MoreSee Less
5 days ago
Thank you Susan Wise Bauer always
Hopefully this will bring more attention to how great Math With Confidence is! 🙌❤️
As an Australian I was shocked at the response to your post in some of the American homeschool groups I'm in. I read and reread the WTM post trying to see what they were saying was there and just couldn't see it. I also found it very ridiculous that so many people were saying, essentially, "don't buy her stuff, but buy mine instead!" So blatant and disingenuous.
by any chance, would you and your husband have crossed paths with us at Westminster? we were there 1985-88 and I swear I knew someone with your name there. But you were there after us? or maybe at a local church in glenside?
My sister!! Keep pressing forward in truth!!!!!!
I am proud to be one of the authors at Well-Trained Mind Press. (I wrote one of the “Who in the World…?” biographies.) Thank you for this statement. I stand with you and am so grateful for your words. 🙏
The Great Kerfluffle of 2011. Those were good times. Thank you for always being a much-needed voice of logic and reason in the homeschooling community.
Did not agree with the post. I thought it was alarmist, but we use Peace Hill and will continue. If I had to agree with 100% with everything we use in education, we would use nothing. Ridiculous to question the faith background on partisanship.
Ah, good times, good times.
To clarify, the Wehner piece is not supportive of the administration use of scripture in this way. It’s not really clear from the quote above but the article is crystal clear. “ The Trump administration has gone one step further, inverting authentic Christian faith by selling in a dozen different ways cruelty and the will to power in the name of Jesus. It has welcomed Christians into a theological twilight zone, where the beatitudes are invoked on behalf of a political movement with authoritarian tendencies.”
You know Susan I just know your dad would be so amazingly proud of you… your mom too, but I remember your dad was a guy who would swim upstream for his convictions. I’m not surprised by the Christian outcry against you and it would seem they are the apostates but are blind. So many of my friends and even some family have departed from the faith and it’s so clear from their stands on these ICE murders.
Funny how many of those same people did NOT use Romans 13 against the Jan 6 rioters. I'm so glad to have known you, and I continue to be proud of all you and Pete are doing!
I appreciate you and what you've shared here so much. May I add: it is primarily the *white* Christian community that is aligning their "Christian beliefs" with this current presidential regime and reacting with such intense vitriol to those who dare to speak with clarity and discernment about the realities we are currently witnessing with ICE. I am reminded of the white Christian parents who jeered and held nasty signs as innocent Black children tried to walk into White schools in the 1960s and think of the way they doubled down on their perspective - on the absolute wrong side of history. Thank you for your courage in speaking up.
While the dissent is loud and brash please know you have SO many Christian (and secular) parents supporting you. Your brand has been repeatedly praised across the spectrum of homeschool groups as events unfold. New parents are reading your books and I get to talk about how much I love MWC. We love being able to educate our children in a way that is in line with our family’s convictions in faith AND social justice.
Thank you for being a rational, compassionate, well-informed voice — it’s only made me appreciate your work and that of the Press more. I’m a homeschool graduate and it’s been disheartening to see so many in that community align with the empire, so to speak. Your posts give me hope!
Thank you for writing this. It would be much easier to try and let it blow over. When I saw what was happening to you in the home ed space it made me ashamed of my fellow Christian home educators. I also knew which groups I needed to remove myself from or people that I should unfollow.
Thank you for this. It means more than you know to this homeschool graduate (who is now homeschooling my own children). It gives me hope.
If you don’t object to ICE’s principles using your own personal or Christian values, you may be putting party before principle. Maybe ask yourself why? Why is it important to you to align with a party, and is it important at all costs?
Thank you for writing so clearly and boldly for truth and for justice, which are greater concerns than political affiliation. Thank you for affirming the law by rebuking abuses of power from those who are called to enforce it. May you be blessed and rewarded.
Brava! Thank you for clearly, and succinctly pointing out that MAGA and Christian Nationalism are in fact, the heresies we should all vehemently oppose.
Done homeschooling now, but I deeply appreciate your principled advocacy. After seeing some of what passes for historical education in the homeschool movement (yikes!), I am glad that your materials are so widely available. Thank you for consistently championing truth, critical thinking, and clarity of expression. I want to say that it's just incredible that folks can somehow maintain allegiance to Christ and to this administration in the same breath--and even identify one as the other--but unfortunately, familiarity with history and human nature makes it all too believable.
I am so proud of you and WTM. As my own children are now either in college or graduating soon, I have left most homeschooling groups. The algorithm still knows how to find me, and I've seen some of the posts you mentioned that question your beliefs and integrity. You've written with a consistent voice, and after having used your (history too) grammar series for my kids (both of whom ended up with perfect ACT scores in English and Writing, btw - thank you for your contribution!), I am not surprised at your eloquence and logical reasoning. You are a breath of fresh air in a community that has forgotten a lot of things. I hope you know that in addition to all the voices questioning you right now, there are many, many of us, who are with you. ❤️
Well Trained Press has been a breath of fresh air for my family’s homeschool journey. Ive read books by you and by others under the WTP umbrella and have appreciated such a well-balanced and kind approach to homeschool that isnt fundamentalist and I appreciate that so much. We are bravely standing with you in this gap of true Christianity and Christian nationalism.
If you're being vilified by Ken Ham zealots, I'd say you're on the right side of things! Thank you for taking a stand publicly and, despite MY being an atheist, doing it biblically.
Thank you for using your platform to speak the truth! I’m so terribly sorry our country and our faith are in such troubled times that your words of virtue are met with vitriol. Please don’t stop.
Sad to report that the West Virginia Connections event on Saturday has been rescheduled because of the weather, so I won't be keynoting this weekend after all. They're still finalizing the new date, but I'll let you know when there's an update. And although I am very sorry to miss the event, I am honestly relieved that I don't have to fight the ice--we were planning to drive there with Well-Trained Mind Press books and were a little worried about how that was going to go.
UPDATE: Connections has been rescheduled for April 25. Unfortunately, I have a prior commitment that weekend so I won't be able to be there--but we're already discussing the possibilities for 2027. ... See MoreSee Less
6 days ago
I am thankful they rescheduled it. We are 6 hours away in the panhandle, and I was worried about the drive as well. I hope I can make the new date in April. I have a rising 9th grader and need all the encouragement!
I live North of the ice; we had snow. A lot of snow. Had to go out locally here. I grew up driving winters in the mountain foothills. Currently in relatively flat Ohio, I can tell you this is bad. Too cold for salt to work. The snow left after the plows is compressed into ice. Cars are failing from the cold. There is just so much that can go wrong. I'm glad you don't have to go out.
Better to stay safe. As a Michigander, I buck snow with the best of them. But, ice is a very different story. There are 2 things that cause massive pileups in the winter in a state of drivers very used to bad weather, ice and white outs. So I vote that his cancellation is a good thing because, frankly, y'all are lightweights at driving in these conditions. Best to stay home with hot tea and a scone. Chocolate chip scones are highly recommended for this purpose. 😁
